The Changing Faces of Friendship: Life Happens in Layers

Growing up, I was the definition of a people person. I loved the company of my friends so much that I would trade almost anything just to be with them, and the feeling was mutual. In primary school, I had a close friend with whom I was inseparable—sharing meals, sitting together in class every day, and spending weekends playing football, watching movies, and even going to church. His love for music inspired me so much that I convinced my dad to buy me a keyboard so I could join him in playing instruments. Back then, I couldn’t imagine a future where we weren’t a part of each other’s lives.

Fast forward to today, and I haven’t heard from him in over a decade. He’s not on social media, and we’ve completely lost touch. If someone had told me then that this would happen, I would have argued otherwise. The same goes for my high school friends—once a lively group, now we mostly just watch each other’s WhatsApp status updates. It’s not that we are no longer friends; it’s just that life has naturally filtered relationships, revealing the difference between the vital few and the trivial many. This also solidifies the difference between friends and acquaintances. Even in Yoruba culture, there’s an adage that says, twenty children cannot play together for twenty years.

Over time, I’ve come to appreciate how life unfolds in layers. While some friendships fade into distant memories, new and meaningful relationships emerge. During my university years, I met people who have been incredibly resourceful, supportive, and inspiring. These connections have shaped me in ways I never expected, proving that most of the people who make the most positive impact on our lives aren’t necessarily those we’ve known the longest, but rather the strategically aligned ones—mostly orchestrated by God.

For young people, especially career professionals, building the right relationships is just as important as building skills. Who you surround yourself with can determine how far and how fast you grow. It’s not just about knowing people; it’s about knowing the right people. Some doors won’t open because of how long you’ve been knocking but because of who is holding the key. Be intentional about connecting with those who inspire, challenge, and uplift you. Relationships should be purposeful—built on shared values, mutual respect, and a vision for growth. Life will always be in motion, but the right people will help steer it in the right direction.